March 23, 2007 | Filed under: Uncategorized

Welcome!

Isn’t this so much nicer than the last place? I hate packing boxes and hiring movers as much as the next person, but sometimes the pain is worth it!

This site isn’t perfect yet (blame me, not Emily), and I’ve got some maintenance to do on the old posts pulled in from Blogger, and on the old, old posts pulled in from I-don’t-remember-where. (Which reminds me, I probably still have an active account there, if only I could remember the site, my username, etc. Hmmm. I wonder what’s hiding over there.)

Anyway. My request here is two-fold: (1) Please be patient as I make the linky links accurate within posts. Referencing former posts and uploading pictures is great…until you move everything to a new location. So, for now, I don’t know where the coffee cups are, just open up all the kitchen cabinets until you find them, and (2) If you see anything that looks funny or doesn’t operate correctly for you, kindly let me know. I may have it on my to-do list, but maybe I haven’t gotten around to noticing that the toilet runs constantly. A quick e-mail will do.

OK, that’s all I’ve got. Have a great weekend, everyone!

Filed under: Uncategorized

Well, y’all, I did it. I managed ONE thing this week that doesn’t suck. Actually, Emily managed most of it, but I’m totally going to take credit for it.

So. Come view my new digs at dailytragedies.com and say hi!

January 29, 2007 | Filed under: Uncategorized

So. I am officially A Skier. One who has a season pass and obsessively checks the Weather Channel snow report and gets up at 5 o’clock on a Sunday morning to drive up to Tahoe for the day.

I’m a little upset at all the lying involved in skiing, though. I was totally unprepared for that. First, the Weather Channel lied to me all week, promising snow for the weekend and then failing to deliver. And then my brain lies to me constantly, telling me certain sections of the run are too challenging, but I go out there and DO IT, so you can just SHUT UP ALREADY, BRAIN.

In all, it was a good day. I bit it a couple of times, but the greatest injury was sustained by my elbow in a rather abrupt interaction between it and the back of a metal chair lift. Of course, this was the run on which I was riding the chair lift with an 11-year old member of the ski team who was about to do a timed run down a black diamond course marked with pins, just like downhill skiing at the Olympics. Awesome. My entire elbow was black and blue before dinner last night. Doubly awesome.

For my troubles yesterday, I was rewarded today with the discovery that I am sick. I woke up with a Jersey-girl-who-smokes-three-packs-
a-day voice — and not the sexy kind, but the “Dude, what is up with your voice?” kind. (Lucky for you, I can talk as much here as I want and it doesn’t hurt or sound funny.)

I thought the voice might be the extent of it, and my steady diet of white bread today should have clued me in, but I finally got the memo when getting up off the couch nearly brought me to tears. Apparently all those aches and pains I’ve been blaming on the skiing (and which, incidentally, have been getting worse as the day progressed, not better) are really my body fighting off infection. And thank goodness, because I was really wondering how I managed to injure my underarms. Even I am not that uncoordinated. Hello, lymph nodes! So nice to see you working hard again! The upshot is that this little disease will peak in a couple of days — conveniently on the same day that I/we/work is hosting a conference. Triply awesome.

And with this dose of optimistic oversharing, I shall take my leave. Bed calls.

January 26, 2007 | Filed under: Uncategorized

For much of the last three years, and before that, nearly every summer in college, I’ve had two jobs. I’ve worked 60-hour weeks (or 70 or 80) for so long that I’d forgotten what it feels like to have only one employer, one major commitment per day, one schedule to keep track of. And now? I’m FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (free falllllling…). And It Is Glorious.

(Poignant observation from Mom: It’s called having a life.)

In honor of my new-found freedom, and the fact that the weekend is rapidly approaching, I present to you:

Things I Have Done Since Quitting Banana

• Spent an evening watching What Not To Wear

• Accepted an invitation to go skiing on less than 48 hours notice
• Cleaned the house
• Grocery shopped
• Gone out with the girls
• Gone out with boys
• Gone to church (no, this was not necessitated by either of the two previous activities)
• Cooked dinner
• Read a newspaper
• Gone to the gym
• Arranged tickets to a fundraiser, followed by an evening of drinking
• Invited people over for the Super Bowl, luring them with the promise of ooey, gooey, cheesy football snacks, which means I will again be grocery shopping and cooking, and that’s OK, because I have the time!
• Booked a trip for a long weekend in DC (February 22-26, mark your calendars)

Do you know what I’m going to do tonight? Yeah, me neither. But you know what I will not be doing tonight? Going to the mall. And that’s all that matters.

January 23, 2007 | Filed under: Uncategorized

Well, I survived. It was a bit harrowing there for a while, with the awkwardness and the feeling off-balance, and at some points it looked as though death was imminent, but I persevered, and made it through yet another ridiculous first date.

What? You thought I was talking about the ski trip?

Skiing was great. I actually do remember some of what I learned last season and I have many small things to work on this year, along with one big thing: I’m a neurotic head case. According to Ski Instructor Geoff, the basics are there and what I need most is a lot more practice. According to me, what I need most is a lot more time with Ski Instructor Geoff. Perhaps not wearing skis. Or maybe wearing skis, whatever, it certainly wouldn’t be the strangest thing I’ve encountered lately. Ahem.

There will be A LOT more skiing this year, because Tahoe is so close and because my goal is to be halfway decent by the time the season is over. I want to get to the point where skiing is like riding a bike, and a year or two from now I can hit the slopes feeling a little rusty, but not so out of practice that I’m back at square one. 2007: The Year I Learn to Ski. Also, 2007: Worst Western Ski Season in Recent Memory. I have impeccable timing.

Dear Gods of the Snow,

Please, please, please make it snow. A lot. In the general vicinity of Lake Tahoe would be nice, but I’m not super picky, just someplace accessible from here. If I could impose on you to aim for the weekends, I promise never to complain about winter again.

Love,

Someone who can’t believe she just requested snow. In mass quantities.

And on that note, here are a few other random requests I have for the world at large. I’m sure they’re not listening to me any more than the snow gods are, but it’s worth a shot.

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Dear Cell Phone Talkers in the Locker Room,

I’m sure that whatever conversation you’re having at 7:00 in the morning is very important, otherwise you wouldn’t be doing it at that volume and in various states of half-dressed-in-sweaty-gym-clothes. However, might I ask you to please, for the love, refrain from such conversation? For starters, there’s the normal rudeness factor of talking on a cell phone in public. But add to it the locker room surroundings and it’s just plain weird. I mean, what you do in your bathroom at home is entirely your business, and if that includes prancing around singing “I Feel Pretty” while you towel-dry your hair, more power to ya. But I doubt you’d do that here, so, please, exercise the same good sense and PUT THE PHONE AWAY.

Love,

Someone who would like just a tad more privacy while she strips down in front of twenty complete strangers, some of whom don’t speak English

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Dear Obviously Single Occupant Vehicles in the Carpool Lane Who Zipped Past Me on the Entrance Ramp This Morning,

You must really like your job. I can see where those two minutes could really make a difference in someone’s life. TPS reports don’t write themselves, you know. Really, I’m happy you’ve found something so fulfilling. I also hope you enjoy the special ring of Hell designed just for you, wherein drivers are stuck on a one-lane highway behind a loooooong line of traffic, the front of which is a John Deere tractor motoring down the road. A little something to look forward to.

Love,

Someone who actually follows the damn rules once in a while

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Dear NPR,

Thank you oh so much for lodging “Superfreak” in my head for the entire day. I probably shouldn’t complain, since I appreciate 99.93458% of what you broadcast. You’re all right. She’s all right. That girl’s all right with me, yeah.

Love,

SEE WHAT I MEAN?????? (super freak, super freak, she’s super-freaky…)