April 30, 2007 | Filed under: I Write About My Feelings

Reasons why I hate myself today:

• I am at work. On my day off. And today is not just in a come-in-in-jeans-and-get-caught-up-on-some-work day, it’s a wear-a-suit-and-sit-in-meetings-all-day day.
• I have this damn song stuck in my damn head. And it’s my own damn fault.
• I am being nice to someone who totally does not deserve it. This aggravates me to no end. But, rather than, I don’t know, actually pulling the trigger and ending things once and for all, I continue to be nice, all the while stewing in righteous indignation over the injustice of it all. So fun! So healthy!
• And then? That someone does something good and redeeming and I hate myself for thinking evil thoughts and generally being a bitch about things. So fun! So healthy!
• I ate half a container of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream yesterday. It wasn’t even that good. What a waste of 500 calories.
• My stupid fucking cervix has decided it needs extra fucking attention, a-fucking-gain, so after yet another trip to the doctor tomorrow, I will be spending the afternoon curled up in a ball on the couch, drinking vodka tonics (tonic optional) until I forget where I am. Care to join me?
• I’m running 13.1 miles on Saturday. Kill me now.

April 29, 2007 | Filed under: I Run Therefore I Am

Did you know that running in 82 degree weather is different than running in 62 degree weather? I’m here to tell you that it is. It is different. And it is different in this way: 82 degrees? Is hot. Especially when you’re running on the sunny side of the street and the asphalt is blasting up at you the heat of a thousand furnaces that it’s been storing all day. Hot.

I recently bought new headphones for my iPod. They were recommended by Sundry, and, well, I do everything The Internet tells me to. I must have defective ears, or perhaps these weren’t designed with running in mind, because less than three minutes into my run, I gave up. Constantly sticking them back in my ears just to have them fall out again two steps later was not working for me. So I ran the damn five miles with no entertainment except what my brain could come up with. I thought about lots of things for this here blog, about 6% of which will ever actually be written and posted; ruminated on some of last week’s shit, which is always a frightening prospect; and, in the final coup de grace of randomness, around mile 4, my brain decided to sing My Sharona. A song whose lyrics I know fewer than half of, and which I have not owned, and perhaps haven’t heard, since Napster was my music download source of choice, back when downloading music from Napster was not yet illegal. (I have now looked at the lyrics. Oh my hell.)

All that to say, my run Thursday was hot. And music-deprived. And not very much fun. I was dehydrated most of the time (woo! let’s hear it for not carrying water with us when we run!). I walked more frequently and for longer than usual. I hurt more. Overall, it sucked. And given that this was only 9 days before Race Day, I did not need a workout that sucked. I needed a workout that said, “I can totally do this.” My Thursday workout said, “Why are we doing this, again?” Argh.

The good news is, the race starts at like 8 AM (8:30? I don’t know. Guess I should figure that out, huh?), so it should be relatively cool next Saturday. The bad news is, if I run anything like I did on Thursday, I’ll still be running at noon, by which time it will definitely be hot.

Saturday’s run, however, was much better. Primarily because I ran right around the time the sun was coming up, so it wasn’t 82 out yet. Also, I switched back to the iPod earbuds. No, they’re not the most comfortable things in the world, but at least they stay in place most of the time and I don’t have to sing songs to myself from the 1970s. Another factor that made Saturday’s run better — actually bringing water with me. In fact, I totally dorked out and bought a running belt thingy-jig.

Fun little side-story: the purchase of this water hydration system, coupled with my need for some delicious gels, took me to my local running store, where I was helped by someone who can only be described as hot. Or, perhaps, HOTT. (Why yes, he did have brown hair and brown eyes. Why do you ask?) Too bad I knew exactly what I was looking for. (”Um, some gel…anything that’s not gross? And, uh, a water thing.”)

While it’s lovely to have constant access to water, this thing still annoys the crap out of me. For starters, it requires one to carry any additional three pounds around one’s waist. People, I am already carrying an extra five pounds around my waist, which is part of why I run in the first place. I do not need any more! In addition, the belt nature of this hydration system serves to squish those five extra waist pounds up into an unsightly roll over the top of the belt. Really, I could do without that aesthetic. I mean, it’s one thing for me to know about those extra five pounds, but it’s quite another to show them off to everyone else on the trail. (Yes, I’m vain enough to care what I look like when I’m working out. Shut up.) But, I guess I will just deal with this. I kinda like being hydrated.

Apparently my legs enjoy this hydration thing, too, because I was running 11-minute miles for the entire 8 mile workout. The whole time I was thinking, “Too! Fast! Must! Slow! Down!” but each subsequent mile was still in the 11-minute range. This has me seriously concerned for Saturday. I need to set a personal best for distance, not for speed. 11-minute miles for better than 13 miles? I’m not sure I’m up for that. But that kind of pace guarantees I’d be done running before it’s 82 out.

April 26, 2007 | Filed under: Because They Pay Me, Is She Still Talking?

Blech. Work has exploded in the past 24 hours, what with their silly documents to be reviewed and conference calls to be on and deadlines and…

I actually have done some writing lately, which you may or may not have seen. So in lieu of a real post today, I’m redirecting you to my new, improved much lengthier profile on the About Me page. Just remember, I can hear you laughing.

April 23, 2007 | Filed under: DC! DC! DC!, I Run Therefore I Am

Well, this Tuesday-only posting schedule certainly seems to have taken hold. Sorry. Once again, I’m going to attempt to enforce some standards around here. Rules like no shoes on the couch and no eating after 8 pm and please, for the love of all that is holy, post more than once a week! (I’ve already broken two of those rules tonight, so, uh, we’ll see how well this goes.)

I realized yesterday that I’ve turned into a bit of a travel snob. Frankly, I’m surprised it took this long, but it has. Checking in for my flight late Saturday night, my seat selections (which United did not allow me to make when I booked the ticket, despite my repeated inquiries) were middle, middle, middle, middle, or that middle seat over there. Argh. When I noticed that there were some lovely window seats available up in the “United Plus” portion of the plane, I succumbed. I paid $44 — of my own money, not work’s — for the privelige of sitting in the 9th row, in a window seat, with enough leg room to cross and uncross my legs if I so desired. Sigh. I have to say, though, that for the 4 1/2 hour flight from Chicago to Sacramento, it was worth every penny. (The deal I made with myself was that I was not allowed to sleep on this flight. If I’m going to pay for the extra room, then by god, I’m going to be awake to enjoy it. Also, I wanted to be able to fall asleep at a reasonable hour once I got home.)

The flight itself was remarkably less eventful than actually getting to the airport had been — it took me an hour and 15 minutes to get to the airport — 5.5 miles away. I started having heart palpitations at the thought that I might very well miss my flight. People, I could have run to the airport faster. I know, because I did it Saturday morning.

Yes, I ran from Courthouse, to the Mount Vernon Trail along the Potomac, and past most of the airport. I followed the trail to the Shops at Crystal City, decided I hadn’t gone far enough, so I doubled back and kept running to the far eastern entrance to National before turning around and heading back home. It was, ballpark, 12 miles in 2 hours and 18 minutes, the last mile of which was entirely uphill and into the wind. HATE.

I have to say, for as much as I love DC and appreciate the National Park Service, this trail is not marked worth crap. On the stretch I ran, there were only three mileposts actually marked, leaving me to guess how far I was running for most of the day. And, either I was running fast or somebody measured wrong, because according to my watch, I ran a particular one-mile stretch in 11 minutes, and that was around my eighth mile of the day, so I have a hard time believing that I was making that good of time. Also, can we all please agree on which side of the trail bikes belong on and which side of the trail runners belong on? Because in Sacramento I was yelled at — YELLED AT — by a biker for running on the right side of the trail, in the same direction as bike traffic. In DC I noticed that most people, but not all, were running on the right side of the trail, but I steadfastly clung to the left edge of the pavement. Right up until a guy on a bike told me (much more politely than Mr. American River Parkway) that I should be running on the right side of the trail. Argh! I’m happy to be a law-abiding citizen (and even happier to avoid being run over by anyone in brightly colored spandex zipping along on their bicycle), but damn it, it’s hard to follow the rules when (a) they’re not posted anywhere and (b) they vary by location. Is there not some Supreme Ruler of the Running Universe who can issue an edict that all runners are to be in x location and all bikers shall be in y location? Is it really that complicated?

Anyway. Saturday was my longest run. Ever. I now feel sufficiently prepared for the half marathon, except for the part about feeling completely unprepared to do any of it. I’m still undecided about the whole gel/not to gel thing. Really, if I were to use gels, I should’ve practiced with them this weekend, but I didn’t. On the other hand, I was definitely hurting that last mile, so perhaps a little energy boost would be a good thing. On the third hand, I have a feeling that my pre-race preparation will not involve two happy hours and five drinks on the night before the race, so perhaps I’ll be in better shape in a couple weeks than I was Saturday. Decisions, decisions!

And, in a display of how colossally insane I have become: I haven’t even run my first half and I’m looking around for the next one. I know there’s another local race two weeks after mine, but I’m not sure I’ll be up for it quite yet. But by June…it’s entirely possible. Thankfully, I’ve managed to get myself on a mailing list somehow and every sponsor of a May or June race in Northern California has sent me an invitation to join them, so I should have plenty to choose from.

Finally, I cannot help but point out that Internet Rockstar Sundry left a comment on one of my previous running posts and I am just so excited that I may be SQUEEEing a little bit and perhaps I don’t need those gels after all, if I can just harness all that excitement and turn it into energy for finishing the last couple miles of the race. If you don’t read her (many, many) blogs already, you should. They are entertaining and informative and full of pretty pictures. And she’s a much better writer (and more consistent poster) than I am. Go!

April 19, 2007 | Filed under: Boys Are Dumb, DC! DC! DC!, I Write About My Feelings

Oy. I’ve been trying to find a way to describe my attitude today, but haven’t stumbled on quite the right sentiment yet. It’s something like this, combined with a healthy dose of this. Plus a heaping scoop of “none of this should really surprise me anymore” cynicism. Maybe this does my attitude justice.

They say bad things happen in threes, and I’ve got a streak of 2-in-24-hours going, so let’s go, Universe, bring on that last one, please, I don’t feel like waiting around until next week.

(This seems to be quite the trend, doesn’t it? Go to DC, watch life take a quick turn toward the shitter. It’s a magical city, I tell you. Fucking magical.)

Anyway… Happy thoughts! Work’s great, they all love me, I managed to put out some fires this week that needed dealing with, yada yada yada. Also, I’m having a fabulous time on the social circuit, and can’t wait for tonight’s fun. (Ladies, I’m happier in person, I swear!) And I feel like a real human being today, as opposed to the embalmed-with-vodka thing I had going on yesterday, so things are off to a great start today. We’ll see how long that lasts…